fR3jclIIszb96iOdpqMK80eDe-U My Half Assed Life: An apology to Pink Floyd fans and some Sea Snakes.

Friday, August 30, 2013

An apology to Pink Floyd fans and some Sea Snakes.

Whenever I'm wandering around my house pretending I know how to keep a house I hear this in my head.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5diMImYIIA


Only instead of the original lyrics I put in things like:

How can I make pancakes if I can't find my beaters.

or

How can I sweep the floor if I can't find my dustpan.

or if I'm really frustrated

How can I keep my house clean if these kids won't move out.

Imagine how surprised I was when I Googled the lyrics and found out the real lyrics aren't "How can you have any pudding if you don't wipe your feet" like I always thought they were. Instead it's really  "How can you have any pudding if you don't eat yer meat."

I'm going to apologize to all the Pink Floyd fans now for being an idiot.

How do you cook Sea Snakes?

I work with an older Chinese gentleman. He asked me the other day if I liked squash. I told him I did and then he said "I bring you one tomorrow" with his arms stretched out to indicate it was a long one. I assumed he meant zucchini.

And then he gave me these things that look like sea snakes or something.


I don't think those are going to fit in my fridge.

Put on your comfy PJ's and come hang out at the Weekend Moonshine Grid. You'll like it!

 

22 comments:

  1. 1. I thought that's what Pink Floyd said, too! That's a mind blow.
    2. Those sea snakes look delicious. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 1. I'm glad it's not just me.
      2. Do you actually know how to cook them because I don't.

      Delete
  2. I don't know that PF song. I really don't know a lot of PF. I probably should know more.

    What kind of squash is that? I've never seen anything like it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Apparently I don't know much Pink Floyd either...

      It's some sort of Chinese squash - I still haven't tried it.

      Delete
  3. What in the hell are you gonna do with that squash? Let us know, huh?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. With the hours I work, it will probably go the way of all produce I buy and wind up either in the garbage or the composter.

      I just don't have the time to cook real food anymore.

      Delete
  4. I misread what you wrote - so I had to google it to make SURE it said "eat yer meat" -- I'm so glad this was one time I was actually correct!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So you've never heard it as "clean yer feet"?

      Delete
  5. I assume you know there is an ENTIRE web site for misconstrued lyrics?
    It's http://kissthisguy.com/ "Kiss this guy" as in the jimi Hendrix song "Purple Haze" one of the most popular misheard line is "Excuse me while I kiss this guy" (instead of the sky). This site is FULL of good ones!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am GOING to check that one out. It will be such a relief to see other people being idiots besides myself.

      Delete
  6. It drives my kiddo crazy when I make up new lyrics for her favorite songs! Funny post - thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My kids would probably get tired of it too if I sang my made up lyrics out loud.

      Delete
  7. I love that line and have blurted it out to my kids on countless occasions. (They get a little tired of me sometimes!) Love your twists--I am going to have to add those to my routine.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Isn't making your kids tired of you an obligatory parental role?

      Delete
  8. Those are some really happy squashes.

    Hugs!

    Valerie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. REALLY REALLY happy squashes. The entire length of my backseat happy.

      Delete
  9. I love that line in Another Brick in the Wall!! I don't think I use it enough on everyday life like you do. I must begin to do this!!--Lisa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I might have a slight touch of OCD - I count laundry as I'm sorting it too.

      Delete
  10. I helps if your stoner friend showed you the movie becasue it's like "really trippy man." The lyrics make more sense then. Well some of them. I still don't get the bit with the giant marching hammers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See now I'm wishing I was more talented and could do giant marching sea snakes/squashes. Except their kind of floppy so it would probably just be awkward.

      Delete
  11. Why can't I find your email? I want to tell you how you should use those things, but it's even too inappropriate for your blog.

    Seriously though, can you email me at birdman at changethetopic dot com? I will rub your bunions if you do.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If you're thinking inappropriately, let me assure you those things are too long for that.

      Delete