fR3jclIIszb96iOdpqMK80eDe-U My Half Assed Life: Pedi-Expert - The Cheese Grater For Feet.

Monday, January 21, 2013

Pedi-Expert - The Cheese Grater For Feet.

This weekend I decided that since I had managed to get myself in for a haircut and get my teeth cleaned (sort of) maybe a little more pampering was in order.

Wonder of wonders I could find a pair of tweezers, so I looked after those pesky whiskers coarse chin hairs that started cropping up after the birth of Asshat #2. Who is also responsible for 99% of my stretch marks.

Then I decided my heels were looking kind of rough. Working on your feet for 70 plus hours will do that to you I guess. So hey, for some Sunday night fun let's break out the callus grater, or pedi-egg or in my case the Revlon Pedi-Expert with it's handy catch all.

It's a cheese grater for your feet ladies. Well gents too, because there's nothing like a well groomed foot on a man.

We may not notice you tried but we sure as hell will notice if you didn't. 

I'm not much on instructions since they require me to find my glasses first, so I figured what the hell I've been grating cheese for years and that's been going okay. How hard can it be?

For removing hard thick skin from your heels that little sucker rocks. Do not expect your heels to feel baby smooth though. Instead they will feel like a block of cheese looks after it's been grated. Pretty much.

Since I didn't read them I don't know if the instructions give you this hint, but whatever you do don't tip the thing upside down or you will leave a noticeable pile of heel gratings wherever you happen to be sitting.

This of course will require you to haul out your vacuum because well - Eeuw! Heel gratings!

Another little tip? When it's time to empty that handy collector bin - don't look. I did. I will never as long as I live be able to eat Parmesan cheese again.

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17 comments:

  1. I will also never look at Parmesan in the same way again. So, thank you for that...
    Tracy @ Momaical

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    1. Sorry about that. Mozzarella tastes pretty good on spaghetti.

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  2. I find my little shavings are gray, which must mean I have dirty feet. But, being gray, it doesn't remind me of parmesan cheese. I didn't read the directions, either, pretty much for the same reason as you, so what I do is probably a big callus grater no-no, but I think it works better if you do it when you're fresh out of the shower and your feet are still damp. Try it.

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    1. I'll give that a whirl - if I ever get longer than 5 minutes in the washroom! ;-)

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  3. Hmmm. Cheese.
    We have some sort of torture device for sale at work that looks like a vegetable peeler. for your feet. So that would make it a Foot Peeler? I'm not really sure, but I am afraid to try it (very afraid.) Also, to smooth out the grated cheese look, there's always the "callus board" or you can just rub them on the carpet really hard right after you take a shower (that's how us classy ladies do it.)

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    1. I think I've seen these - scary looking. I wonder if it comes with a stitch yourself up kit?

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  4. Thought about getting one of these.. Not any more tho, thanks. :) I saw some kind of cream on t.v. and it says all you have to do is wipe it on and wipe it off and bye bye crusty feet! Think I'll wait on a review for that as well..

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    1. It works. Sort of - I just think some sort of finer grit is needed for the final sanding.

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  5. As a typical guy, I don't really pay much mind (or any, really) to state of my the heels. My wife usually lets me know when I need to tend to them. Usually, it's when we're in bed and she kicks my feet away and says, "OW! Get those things away from me!"

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    1. See - I told you - we notice when you don't!

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  6. I have one of these. I have to place my foot over a towel or else heel shavings go everywhere. My collection bin can't contain them all. (I'm too lazy to vacuum)

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    1. That probably would be more efficient. But then I would have missed out on aggravating #1 by running the vacuum at 11pm.

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  7. Hubbs has this thing that slices sheets off foot calluses like it's a block of Cabot. Nastiest thing I have ever seen.

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    1. That does sound kind of nasty - but at least his feet are looked after right?

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  8. On the up side, if the Assholes ever really piss you off, you could put the heel gratings on their spaghetti and tell them it's parmesan cheese

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    1. Stacey, I almost spewed my drink all over my computer when I read this. You have an evil mind! I love it.

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  9. I recently tried something I found on Facebook that worked well before you use the grater thing. It's a combination of Listerine, white vinegar and hot water. Soak for 10 minutes and the skin is so easy to remove

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