fR3jclIIszb96iOdpqMK80eDe-U My Half Assed Life: Realizing I'm Better than Okay

Friday, January 3, 2014

Realizing I'm Better than Okay

I woke up this morning and realized something.

Right after I realized that if your dog gorged himself on stolen cat food the night before it's best to get up and let him out when he asks instead of yelling at him to go lay down.

I'm sorry Louie - I know that little accident left you feeling mortified. I could tell by the way you tip-toed around the evidence when I finally pried my lazy ass out of bed, but Mommy really wanted to sleep a little more.

I realized that going into 2014 as a single woman doesn't bother me at all. In fact it's kind of liberating. I can read whenever I want to. I don't have to be sociable when I don't feel like it. I can blog and write whenever I please. If I want to sit on twitter all night I can.

With Asshat#1 moved into his own place, I don't have two, or even three loads of laundry every night. Asshat#2 will actually tidy up after himself and his mother, so I don't have to come home to a house that looks so much worse than it did when I left in the morning.  Sometimes it even looks so much better than it did when I left.

If I feel like serving frozen pizza for dinner, I can do that. If I'm not hungry and I don't feel like cooking I don't have to. (As long as I've got a freezer full of loaded-with-white-bread-carbs-and-sodium prepackaged food that #2 loves).

I no longer spend my weekends sitting in The Polish Guy's garage drinking too much and trying to make conversation with a man who has no conversation to speak of. I don't have to listen to him moan about how broke he is even though he makes twice as much as me. I don't have to listen to him bitch about his ex-wife being a terrible mother when in fact she did a damn fine job of raising his children.

I no longer have to hear someone belittle my passion for writing and blogging by referring to my blog as "my bloopers". I've stopped feeling as if I can never be enough and hangovers are no longer just a regular weekend morning for me.

So instead of feeling as if I'm starting another year alone, I feel as if I'm starting the year unencumbered. I'm no longer carrying the weight of trying to hang on to something that isn't worth hanging on to.

It feels pretty damn good.

***

Linking up with The Weekend Moonshine Grid at Yeah Write - because the people at Yeah Write make me feel good too. 


31 comments:

  1. Uh, hell yeah. I am so fist bumping this post right now.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow... Big Ditto!!! Well not the first part, I don't have a dog. Good move ditching the Polish Guy and enjoy life until the right one comes along. Like a guy who admires your blog and is not a pain in the ass.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have to confess - he ditched me. But it's okay now that I realize he did me a huge favor.

      Delete
  3. What a great post! I was smiling for you the whole way through. :-) x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was smiling as I wrote it - so thank you.

      Delete
  4. I know that feeling. It's called freedom and IT.IS.AWESOME! Yay you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. At this stage of my life it seems to be exactly what I need most.

      Delete
  5. You are definitely better than okay. Unencumbered is a fabulous way to start the year. Fly. Soar. Happy New Year to you :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is a fabulous way to start the year isn't it? A New Year with all sorts of new possibilities.

      Delete
  6. You are not just okay, you are super awesome amazing. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Holly - I kind of feel the same way about you.

      Delete
  7. That sounds like a perfect start to 2014 to me!! I'm glad your Asshat ratio is more manageable!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Much more manageable - or at least keeping them in clean clothing is more manageable.

      Delete
  8. Good for you! Great post!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Yay! 2014's gonna be a great year!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It may not be an easy year, but at least I've got room to grow.

      Delete
  10. Awesome! Happy new year--I'm glad your feeling good about what must have been a painful change to have to go through.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It was hard and it was painful. It's never easy to let go of your hopes even if you've started to realize they're empty hopes.

      Delete
  11. It's a new page, you can make it whatever you want it to be. Sounds like it's going to be a good one. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's got some potential, now lets see what I can make of it.

      Delete
  12. That was a nice post except the fact that I hate frozen pizza :P Freezing just kills the taste you know ;) Amazing post ! Love your blog too xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The trick to frozen pizza is thin crust and toppings that you would never get on a "real" pizza. My favorite frozen is Spinach & Provolone.

      Delete
  13. Awesome post! Have an amazing New Year! I am not single, but I am a little jealous of the freedom you have. Right now, I must go make my husband dinner, while you can do whatever you please. That's nice :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I do still cook supper a few times a week, but the kid still at home is perfectly happy with easy stuff like fried egg sandwiches so I don't always have to do the meat, potatoes and vegetable grind.

      Delete
  14. Vanessa-this was awesome. I'm so glad you feel liberated. Happy new year to you, indeed!

    ReplyDelete