They're some weird ass version of skinny jeans - if a size 14 could ever be anything remotely close to skinny. In order to allow this miracle of "skinny" jeans, they have spandex in them.
No they are not those god awful jeggings - they're denim. I've got some taste.
For whatever reason, even though the legs fit close all the way to my ankles (which makes my feet look HUGE by the way) from the crotch up, they're baggy. So baggy, that I don't even know if the zipper works because I've never had to use it.
If I were shaped like Humpty Dumpty they would be a perfect fit.
I spent the entire day pulling my pants up. Every third time I would have to pull my underwear up too, since as my pants were trying to slide down my ass they were taking my underpants along for the ride.
It makes a long day even longer when you're wearing pants like that.
And then the boss showed up...
Near the end of the day the owner came out to the pack house floor. We're doing a brand new pack that takes forever.
He told us everything we were doing wrong and was shocked that we hadn't come up with a better solution.
Trust me - I see things from his point of view. Business men go into business to make money, not lose it. Still that Just. Was. Not. Fair. We had tried to get some discussion going about our concerns. I had sent an email to my manager right away. We didn't get any sort of response, advice or a conclusion Monday, so I delayed the order. Tuesday we had to take some sort of action and that was what we came up with.
So I yanked up my saggy, baggy assed pants and pulled out my big girl words. You know - the ones that don't start with an f or end in a k?
I don't mean to be disrespectful sir, but I tried to get some discussion going about this pack yesterday by sharing our concerns. We didn't get any response so I delayed the order until today.
The owner was very quick to apologize, and that's how you win the respect of your employees.
Pizza anyone?
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| Just like pizza - minus the oregano. |
For the record if you are ever standing above a pallet of ripe cocktail tomatoes in cardboard you WILL crave pizza.
Boobies
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| Who's got big boobs? |
Also? Jamaican ladies have the best sense of humor. Now I just hope the Mennonite lady who was walking by as I was taking this picture wasn't offended. Otherwise I might be in shit tomorrow.
By the way, we had pizza for dinner and damn it was good.
There is so much awesome in this post, I don't even know where to start! I've heard of spandex jeans but haven't had the guts to buy them yet.
ReplyDeleteI approve of the tomato boobs, and I want a pair!
I don't know why some tomatoes grow that little thing on the bottom, but they do make for some funny pictures.
ReplyDeleteIt's cool that your words were taken well by the boss. That doesn't always happen.
ReplyDeleteIt's the second time I've disagreed with him. Each time, while he does have a rebuttal you can tell he thought about what I said before responding. I'm getting the sense that while he may not always agree with what I have to say, he will take the time to hear and consider my point of view.
DeleteAt the end of the day, that's enough.
My skinny jeans do the same thing! I never use the zipper, they slide down all the time, either taking my underpants with them or allowing my thong to stick up over the top of the wasteband for all to see.
ReplyDeleteSuck up to that Mennonite lady and maybe she'll make you those amazing cinnamon rolls for which they all seem to have the same secret recipe.
I would except she works the same hours I do and if she still manages to find time to bake, I might have to shoot myself. I can't even keep up with my laundry.
DeleteA size 14 is pretty thin, in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteIf it were a real size 14 I would be happy with them. I think they might actually be more like a 16. Also, I'm not very tall.
DeleteMaybe they're maternity jeans?
ReplyDeleteAnd well done on being assertive but polite with the boss. Me, I'd have let my Irish quarter's temper flare.
Maternity jeans would explain the odd fit.
DeleteI will be so happy when the skinny jean phase is over. Glad things went well with your boss!!!
ReplyDeleteI may or may not have missed about 3 styles for jeans over the past few years. I've been waiting to lose that 20 pounds before buying new pants. Okay, it's really 40 pounds.
DeleteI just love your sense of humor and how you write about your day!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
DeleteI am laughing SO HARD because I have a wonky pair of pants that I wear from time to time, too. The way you described your humpty dumpty pants was perfect!
ReplyDeleteNice tomatoes!! ;) --Lisa
Hi didn't mean to copy your "nice tomatoes" response, i didn't notice until after i published my comment! :)
DeleteThey are nice tomato ta tas aren't they?
DeleteNice tamatas! I think I have those same pants in a size 16 (I feel like I should say "I just had a baby" but I was chubby before that) and so many times I came thisclose to giving them away. Yet, I know they are still shoved in the back of my bottom drawer. Why do we keep these?
ReplyDeleteIf they were comfortable I could justify still having them a lot easier. The sad truth is I can't stand shopping.
DeleteI HAVE THOSE PANTS! Well, minus the skinny part. I have oddly muscular calves, and skinny jeans make me look like a body builder that let themselves go about 3 years ago and replaced their protein shakes with Twinkies.
ReplyDeleteAlso: I want to work with you.
The only reason I even own skinny jeans is because they were on the reduced rack. Here in Canada $14 bucks for a pair of jeans is a steal. Who cares if they actually fit.
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