fR3jclIIszb96iOdpqMK80eDe-U My Half Assed Life: Weekend Funnies #7

Friday, April 12, 2013

Weekend Funnies #7

I've got a love/hate thing going with Q-tips. Most of the hate is due to the arseholes I live with who leave the used ones laying on the bathroom counter.

When it comes right down to it though I can't live without them, even if I sometimes do try for a week or so. The last time I tried to not buy them I completely caved and dove into The Polish Guy's stockpile of them like they were the greatest treat on earth. What those cheap off brand cotton swabs found in my ears was so horrifying that I had to hide the evidence lest he see and think poorly of me.

It has to be brand name Q-tips too. They're the only ones that have the exact right amount of cotton on them and the sticks that are strong enough to give some real leverage. Once when I had no-name cotton swabs I went to use one and felt the scratch of a cottenless stick. I spent the day worried that the cotton had fallen into my ear. It was similar to the anxiety that swallowing a bug produces.

Don't even try to tell me you never stick a cotton swab in your ear either. I won't believe you - how the hell else do you scratch an itchy ear? The warning on the box makes me laugh every time I read it because seriously - why else would you buy cotton on a stick?

Weekend Funnies #7

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8 comments:

  1. This is so true!!! The brand name ones are the only ones sturdy enough. It was a long road of trial and error over generics before I realized to just go Q-tip all the time.

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    1. Exactly! When my ear is itchy I want a Q-tip, not a generic.

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  2. I asked myself the same question. A warning? Really? Like every single person who buys swabs doesn't use them for the same purpose.

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  3. My husband is addicted to them, too. I use them, but not as often.

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    1. My kids are addicted to leaving the used ones on the bathroom counters. Personally, nothing beats a cotton swab when you've got an itchy ear.

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